I have always had some rocky trust issues with God, but we've been working toward some solid trust. After coming back from Central Asia my trust plummeted. Now that we are planning to go back for a couple weeks, I am afraid to have optimism. I know that we should both go to Af, but I just can't find the strength to believe that we are both going to be able to go. Nate has been incredibly encouraging, but this takes my own choice to believe. Yesterday, our chances started looking even more bleek. I took a moment and really talked to God about how scared I am and how I don't trust him right now. He spoke to me about having no extra back up plans. I ALWAYS have a back up plan. I never fully trust anyone or anything. (Full honesty coming out here.) I never believe something is going to happen, so I don't have to worry when it doesn't. So God is challenging me to trust and have no back up plan. I've tried to make back up plans already, but they have been pulled away.
I could use your prayer for this trust. Trust that we will go to Af and even more that if we don't go, that I have laid everything in God's hands and understand why we couldn't go.
Thank you.